Personal message to everyone who thinks the permit holder for Occupy Seattle should be on a rotating basis

I have accepted the personal invitation of the Mayor of Seattle to occupy City Hall for more than two months now, making this the most successful and long-lived occupancy in America. No one else did that. Not to go all Ayn Rand on your ass, but I did that, and without one single penny of funds or ounce of encouragement from the Occupy movement. Mike McGinn has been kind enough to offer me, not you, a permit to sign every week, and every week I have accepted. This occupation is only continuing because I now have a proven track record of making agreements with the city and abiding by them. The only other person in Seattle with such a track record is Vivian McPeak, permit holder for Hempfest for 20 years, my mentor, and the only person I consulted before signing my first permit. (FYI, he considers the idea of "rotating permit holder" to be absurd and counter-productive, and I'm infinitely more prone to listen to his advice than anyone else's.)

There is no precedent for any of this. We're all blazing trails in the wilderness. We can't follow any previous revolutionary model. This is a new thing. I'm not following any game plan other than keeping it alive. A US mayor offering a chunk of city fucking hall to a political organization in order for then to live and thrive so they can expel corruption from the bowels of government in conjunction with hundreds of other Occupy sites around the world? Impossible. Yet it's happening because I've persevered when others gave up, I actually trust that Mayor McGinn and the city council have got the movement's back, and I won't let this incredible relationship be jeopardized by some peculiar notion that personal success must be punished and all duties must be shared. 

It's not like it was ever my goal in life to be a permit holder. The only reason I am one is because nobody else was willing to step up and sign the paper, but this isn't what I want to do. I want to write best-selling novels and make movies in Hollywood with a swimming pool full of bimbos. Instead, I'm a permit holder in a leaky tent in Seattle. C'est la fucking vie. If anyone else wants the duties of permit holder, I got no problem delegating authority. You want to run the tent, all you've got to do is ask. You want me to tell the city that your signature is as trustworthy as mine, I won't, because I don't know that. I just met all of you, and we're the easiest organization on earth to infiltrate. I have no idea what you have in mind. You might be a CIA agent or undercover cop or just plain psycho out to destabilize the movement, because that's what a "rotating" leadership is, destabilized.

The only person who can evict Occupy Seattle from city hall is Mayor Mike McGinn, and he can do it with a snap of his fingers by simple withdrawing his invitation. We mysteriously have a relationship of respect, made obvious when the Mayor emailed my phone number to Police Chief Diaz as the person to talk to if he has any more problems with the Occupy movement. I've asked to be on the police oversight committee, where I believe the Occupy movement needs to be represented. Anyone else ask to be on that committee? Please don't be shocked if it turns out to be me just because I was the only one who asked. (More likely, no one from Occupy.)

In any case, as long as a permit is offered me, I will accept it. We are not a leaderless movement, we are a leaderful movement. If anyone else wants a permit, please, I actively encourage you to go get one. We need more Occupy sites. I hope to inspire you. But this one's mine.

An Occupied Hempfest Christmas

Occupy Seattle met at Gasworks for a pot luck Christmas eve dinner.

There was an overabundance of sweets. If you're diabetic, you might have died. 

There was real food too, ham and turkey and salad and stuffing. Everyone was well fed.

The fire was nice and just the thing we need at all the other Occupy sites in winter. (Good luck with it.)

The only ones who had anything to complain about were the actual occupants of Gasworks, the homeless who were living there under the radar, and who worried that Occupy Seattle would draw attention to them and get them thrown out. They were sitting at their own table saying "Fuck the Occupiers, they're going to ruin this for everybody if they set up camp." Luckily, even though the invitation was made, nobody set up tents, and the actual occupiers of Gasworks were free to remain. This is a problem we have to face. The Occupy movement has got to advocate for the homeless and not fuck things up for them. They are us. 

The next morning, Christmas day, Hempfest had its annual drug war protest at the city jail. It was a trek for everyone else to get downtown. For me, it was just a walk across the street from the Occupy tent at city hall.

It's a strange event, sad but hopeful...

that nobody sees...

the streets are almost vacant...

but we're not doing it for them,

we're doing it for everybody in this horrible building who doesn't belong... 

and we know they can't hear us when we sing them Christmas carols... 

but we do it anyway... 

hoping every prisoner on earth who is a victim of the drug war can somehow feel our presence, that there's someone out here who cares, because what else are we going to do...

let the DEA get away with ruining lives,

destroying families, 

preventing sick people from getting their legitimate medicine,

and refusing to budge on the issue until every corporation currently making a killing on the outlawing of pot gets to wet their beak on the decriminalization?

When it should be free, with no more regulation than tomatoes, as safe as a medicine can be, a sacrament, a blessing, and the greatest and most useful plant on earth.

We wish you a marijuana,

We wish you a marijuana,

We wish you a marijuana,

and a hempy new year.

Protesters in Westlake for a major American hero

Does being a liaison between Occupy Seattle and the Chief of Police make me a traitor?

I live at city hall. The first thing I do every morning is read the mayor's newspaper in his waiting room on the 7th floor. This morning, the lead story concerned the US Justice department ripping the Seattle Police department a new one for its use of excessive force. They were particularly hard on Chief of Police John Diaz who was actively defending his department.

Ever see a picture in a newspaper and look up to see that person standing in front of you? Chief Diaz came right out of the elevator and went in to a meeting with the Mayor.

Afterwards, they both emerged from McGinn's office and stood there talking in front of me. God knows what inspired me to butt my ugly head into a conversation between the Mayor and the Chief of Police, but I walked right up to introduce myself. I thanked Mayor McGinn for making our site at City Hall the most successful and long-lived in America. He said he was waiting for someone to notice that.

Diaz saw this happen, an open and trusting relationship between the mayor and an occupier, so I took advantage of the moment. I told Chief Diaz that I was from the Hempfest and used to working with the police to put on protest events. I offered myself as a liaison between himself and the movement, making it very clear that I was taking this action unilaterally, without approval from the general assembly, but I was deliberately disobeying the rule not to talk to police because we need a dialogue going. I was very clear I was speaking only for myself, not FOR the movement, but simply as a member OF the movement. He agreed and asked for my contact information.

I searched for a pen. He searched for a pen. Mayor McGinn told me to just give my information to his secretary and she would send it on.

Cool. When Chief Diaz got back to his office, there was an email waiting for him from the Mayor saying if he ever had any problems with the Occupy Movement, give Michael Dare a call. Hilarious. I'm not holding my breath.

In any case, Mayor McGinn was more than pleased to see such an exchange, and renewed his commitment to working with those in the movement willing to work with instead of against the system. He agreed to sit down later to discuss the future of the movement and how we can work together to further both of our goals.

Like it or not, Occupy Seattle now has a liaison with the Mayor's office and the Police Department.

I posted this information to an Occupy group and someone responded with this... "If you talk to a cop and he beats you then you are a hero. If you talk to a cop and both you and the cop are civil and even discuss your different opinions.... Well then you're just a snitch and a traitor! But good for you!"

Let me clarify what I believe a "liaison" does by inventing a fantasy situation.

Let's say we're gathered somewhere surrounded by police. We are quite rationally fearful of getting pepper-sprayed or worse, so we prepare for a clash.

The liaison walks up to the police and says "Hi guys, what's up? Why are you here? What are we doing wrong?"

The police say "It's the candle."

The liaison says "What?"

The police say "You can't have an open flame."

The liaison says "You've got to be kidding me. You're not here to suppress free speech?"

The police say "You can have as much free speech as you want. What you can't have is an open flame."

The liaison says "So if we blow out that candle, you'll go away?"

The police say "Yep."

The liaison walks back to the Occupy gathering and says "All they care about is the candle. Blow out the candle and the cops will go away."

The liaison is stared at in disbelief. Somebody takes it upon themselves to blow out the candle just to see what will happen. The cops go away.

Voila. Incident averted. A peaceful protest is allowed to continue because somebody talked to the police.

This is obviously over-simplified but you get the idea. Sometimes mis-communication is the only problem. The police don't know what we're doing so they are naturally fearful of entering the situation. Their entire training has to do with how to handle unstable situations. As for being a "snitch," sometimes, literally, all the police need to know is what we're doing.

Once again, let's say we're gathered in a park. The police are there prepared for anything because they don't know what we're going to do. Somebody goes up to them and says "We're marching from here to the Federal building for a short rally, then returning here."

The police have an INSTANT change of tactics. Knowing where we're going and what route we're taking, the police move in front of us to CLEAR THE ROUTE. Suddenly, they're working FOR us to make sure nobody gets hurt.

Okay, this tactic wouldn't have worked at the docks where we were clearly breaking the law, but there have been other situations where all we were doing was exhibiting free speech. In those situations, violence can have be completely averted by simply informing the police ahead of time where we're marching, 

As a liaison, obviously I know a lot of things I'm not telling the police, like where marijuana grow rooms are situated in Seattle, or where Jimmy Hoffa is buried. (In one of the grow rooms.) But if I tell the police "We're going to be meeting here at this time and marching to there at that time," does that make me a police informant? Not any more than Vivian McPeak is a police informant when he tells the Seattle Police department that hundreds of thousands of people are going to be gathering in Myrtle Edwards Park in an open act of civil disobedience in protest against the War on Drugs.

Hempfest is the world's largest peaceful protest rally. In a city park. With the co-operation of the Mayor and Police. This is a city that lets Hempfest happen. This is a city that will let the Occupy movement happen. All you've got to do is talk to them.

How to Deal with Corruption in One Easy Lesson

Corruption trumps political systems. In a corrupt democratic government, those with the most money tell the government what to do. In a corrupt socialist government, those with the most money tell the government what to do. If a government is corrupt, it matters not what particular system the corruption uses to express itself. Corruption IS the system. A corrupt dictatorship, in which the moneyed puppetmasters actually pull the strings, is no better than a corrupt Republic in which the moneyed puppetmasters actually pull the strings. When corruption permeates the system, it doesn't matter who's in charge because they're not in charge, they're just figureheads for corruption, like the Pope or the President, they only keep their jobs when the let the money river roll on, no matter how many drown.

So what do we do when all three branches of Federal Government, legislative, executive, and judicial, are undeniably, completely, and utterly corrupt? How do we use the system in place to root out the corruption when corruption specifically won't allow the system to work that way? Voting is meaningless when the voting system is corrupt. Suing is meaningless when you can't go any higher than a Supreme Court who are the active enemy of the public domain, appointed for life, who will only make pro-corporate decisions. Petitioning is meaningless because the puppetmasters behind the puppets can't be petitioned. Give me a choice between a corrupt Democrat and a corrupt Republican and I might as well cut my throat, they're both from the same party, the Corrupt Party, loyally in the hands of whoever's willing to pay. When corruption rules the day, money gets whatever it wants. Want to pollute the air, poison the groundwater, go to war to protect the bottom line of the fuel market? All it takes is money. And guess who rules the monetary system? Not you.


Our argument is not with democracy. A genuine democracy is a beautiful thing. But a corrupt democracy, in which money literally buys votes, is no better than corrupt monarchs or corrupt commies. The system is simply the method by which we all get screwed, even systems that were specifically designed to protect us.


They keep saying they don't know what we're for, only what we're against, as though being against corruption isn't enough to define us. 


The movement has a flat structure. I can't claim to be speaking for the 99%, but I can claim to speak AS one of them. 

I want it to be a felony for a candidate running for or in office to accept one single penny from anyone, RETROACTIVE to the year 2000. I want every one of those corrupt bastards who put Bush in office in jail. I want the entire Supreme Court fired with a new system in place in which they're not appointed for life but for ONE YEAR, then we get to vote on whether to keep them. I want everyone at Fox News to commit ritual hari-kari, live, on camera, at half-time during the Superbowl. I want Rupert Murdoch and Donald Trump to dress like Vikings and fight each other to the death for the title of Douchebag of the Year. I want every debt erased. Period. Every one. After a certain reasonable amount for one's children, say a hundred thou, I want a 100% inheritance tax. I want everything a person owns, all their copyrights, patents, and art, to enter the public domain upon their demise. What do they care? They're dead. Now everything they made is ours. The public. I want more public bathrooms. I want Barack Obama to tell Ben Bernanke to go fuck himself. I want the responsibility for health care to be completely taken away from employers, insurance companies, and HMOs and be available for free, just like the police and fire departments, to anybody, as a human right. When they're not actively engaged in fighting the enemy, I want the US Navy to clean up the oceans, the US Army to clean up the land, and the US Air Force to clean up the air. I want everyone in jail for a victimless crime to be set free and restitution paid. I want the FDA to tell the pharmaceutical industry what to do instead of the other way around. I want the EPA to tell polluters what to do instead of the other way around. I want the FED eliminated. I want the DEA eliminated. I want Boeing to stop building killer drones and start building rapid transit. I want Seattle to expand the free bus zone to the entire city.


There. That's my position. I'm sure I'll think of more later, but it's a start. Let's start negotiating.

Occupy the holidays in Seattle City Hall

Meeting with the 1% in city hall

I was watching Countdown with Keith Olbermann on my Chromebook in the lobby of city hall when I couldn't help but overhear the conversation at the table next to me, three guys, well dressed, one larger, older, clearly one of the 1%, and as they talked I understood him to be an expert in the affairs of landlords and probably a landlord himself. This was a guy I had questions for.

So as they broke up and he headed across the lobby, I walked up, introduced myself, and asked him if he'd mind answering a few questions. I never got his name. Maybe that's why he was so forthright. My main question, is there any way to LEGALLY occupy a vacant space in Seattle? Here's my interpretation of what he said...

As soon as you move into a vacant property, you are de facto legally creating a landlord/tenant relationship with the owner of the property. This makes the owner of the property legally responsible for all those things landlords are liable for in their area, in Seattle, upkeep, like fixing the plumbing, etc.

Of course there are landlord/tenant agreements where the tenant agrees to take care of such things, so everything is negotiable. So one good thing to do upon occupying a vacant property is draw up a legal paper indemnifying the landlord and not only agreeing to but actually doing all necessary repair work. The whole idea is if you're not costing the landlord anything, if you're actually improving the property, they won't have an incentive to evict you since eviction itself costs money.

Having a vacant property isn't a tax write-off. There is no monetary incentive for landlords to leave properties vacant, just laziness. Pay the legitimate landlord ANYTHING and it's profit they weren't making before. Mail off that check for $10 rent every month. All they have to do is cash one of them and you're set.

Owen Meany's Sacrilegious and Hilarious Christmas Pageant

Have yourself a rollicking, perverse, slapstick Christmas with Book-It Repertory's new production of Owen Meany's Christmas Pageant, based upon chapter four of John Irving's novel A Prayer for Owen Meany. It tells the enchanting tale of the valiant attempts of the Reverend Wiggins and his wife - of Christ Church of Gravesend, New Hampshire - to put on a normal, humble Christmas pageant but who, through no fault of their own, find themselves trapped in a chapter of a John Irving novel, and Irving won't be done with them till he's wrenched every drop of pious ooze from their trembling bodies. 


Never has more gone wrong with a Christmas theatrical production. It's almost a Jerry Lewis movie, the laughs keep rolling in, but Irving is smarter than that, and the whole affair is drenched in sadness due to the strange relationship of the narrator, Johnny, to his best friend, the diminutive and irritating Owen Meany. 


According to the book, not only was Owen's growth stunted to under five feet, he damaged his larynx and has to shout through his nose in a wrecked voice. I can't imagine a harder acting job than having to play someone completely irritating to everyone IN the play but not so much to everyone in the audience who better not hate the main character. Josh Aaseng pulls off this complicated task with a simple falsetto and a lot of comic dexterity.


Connor Toms, from Book-It's previous production of Irving's The Cider House Rules, is particularly good as Johnny, the narrator with a hole in his heart he never talks about. 


It seems one day they were playing baseball when Owen hit a high fly ball that killed Johnny's mother, one of the many of random acts that appear throughout Irving's books in his deep-rooted philosophy that life is uncontrollable. 


When you've got a line in a book like "Simon and I never spoke of my mother because it was just too painful," it's too important to leave out and yet impossible to delegate to dialogue. Once again, Book-it provides the perfect solution by having Johnny say the line from the book directly to the audience.


This isn't your mother's Christmas Pageant. My favorite moment was when the little baby Jesus had to throw cues at the angel of the lord who forgot his lines - just the way it really happened. If you're looking for reverence, look elsewhere. If you're looking for the most subversive Christmas play ever, get your tickets now.




The program for the show.